Let's Give Thanks!

We humbly propose putting the "Thanks" back in Thanksgiving, and giving a big shout out to all of our favorite newsmakers.  Their inexplicable behavior makes life livable in these terrible times and we can only hope the stress of modern living continues indefinitely--it makes for such good watching.

So let's start with our least favorite sports figure, the third baseman for the NY Yankees, Mr. Alex Rodriguez.  Oh, the choices one makes in life.  

Like dumping your unbelievably hot wife for a slightly used 50 year old would-be dominatrix, whose recent photos are well, just not great.  It must be for the money.  

Perhaps Madonna's Kabbalahistic influence (is religious conversion for sex and/or money the theme of the last six month or what!), can bring out the best in A-Rod ($5 says she's got another nickname for him). But what if the opposite happens--what if she sucks the best out of him and leaves moping and lovesick at third base. Oh wait, it can't get much worse, can it!

One also wonders what the conversation between Derek Jeter and A-Rod is like these days.  No longer:

Derek:  Your wife is so hot, I would so hit that.  She have any friends?

A-Rod: Yeah, I know.  Let me ask her.

Nowadays it's:

Derek: Stay away from me with your psycho girlfriend and quit talking about that Kabbalah shit. And how about a clutch hit once in awhile?

A-Rod: You just don't understand.  It's not about that for me anymore.

Let's pause momentarily and try to get at the reason behind all this. Throughout her history, Madonna has always found boyfriends who bring something to the table--for her best interest.

"I want to get in the movies." (See Sean Penn and Warren Beatty)

"I want to be a popstar." (Endless count of musicians and record producers)

"I want to be black because Hip Hop is in." (See Dennis Rodman)

"I want to be "international." (See Guy Ritchie)

So, she must be finally settling down for a quiet life of mediocrity. Watch out Barry Zito or Sarah Palin--you might be next.

There was nothing mediocre about the Top's bold selection last night. The 30 point lead at half-time was probably a sign that the Cavs would cover 5.5.  LeBron even sat out the 4th quarter. How embarrassing.

We're on a mini-roll, i.e. one day.  So let's use that momentum to get ready for tomorrow's big line-up, affectionately nick-named, "The Turdkey Bowl."

Tennesee -10.5 at Detroit

Over/Under 44.5

Detroit showed a glimmer of hope last week, racing out to a 17 point lead only to watch it evaporate into their usual display of horrible defense and ineffectual play-calling.  Everything is wrong in the city of Detroit right now (except the Red Wings).  Good, let's hope it stays that way---the city has nothing to offer outside out of proximity to the casinos of Windsor and decent Greek food.

With Indianapolis breathing slightly down their necks, the Titans come racing back.

Take Tennessee minus the points.  And play the over--it's a pretty safe bet with the Lions.

Seattle-13 at Dallas

Over/Under 46.5

Here come the Cowboys, just in time to scare every Giant fan out there.  Last week's explosive performance by TO has to be a warning shot across the bow.  The Seahawks absolutely suck. The Cowboys build on last week.  This game is NASCAR.

Cowboys minus the points and the over.

Arizona +3 at Philadelphia

Over/Under 46.5

Philadelphia's season hangs in the balance.  If they can't win this one, it's packing time. Donovan heads back in after two mediocre performances against an accomodating Cardinal defense.  We're not sure who will win, but we like the Eagles to circle the wagons.  And this will be a high-scoring affair if there ever was one!

Eagles--money line and the over

Tomorrow's post is likely to be late and a little briefer than usual.  So enjoy your turkey and as usual:

Happy Hunting and 

Go Stuff!

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